The weeks and months after my first child was born were some of the most difficult I have ever experienced. I was depleted from blood loss, and it felt like all the nutrients in my bones and muscles were being concentrated into the growing baby and breastmilk. For the first few days, my husband carried me down the stairs. He changed every diaper for the first month. However, the sleep deprivation, the intense emotional changes, and continual nutritional depletion converged to bring me to a point of stress in my system I was unprepared for and had little facility to manage.
A Physician’s Journey: Yoga & Meditation to Holistic Medicine-- Excerpts From a New Book by Dr. Dennis Chernin
Excerpts From Yoga & Meditation to Holistic Medicine: A Physician’s Journey, a new book by Dr. Dennis Chernin.
Namaste, Katie... Our Yoga Column, Fall 2021
hether you're a seasoned yogi or getting ready to roll out your mat for the first time, here you'll find a variety of useful tips from local yoga instructor, Katie Hoener.
Healers of Ann Arbor: HeartMath™ with Rachel Egherman
“HeartMath™ is heart-focused breathing, or breathing through the heart space,” Rachel Egherman said of the gentle form of self-care that helps you check in with your body, your heart space, and feel supported. “This is something you can do yourself in the grocery store line. It’s a way to quickly self-regulate.”
Waking Up After 2020
Here we are in autumn and soon leaning toward winter, the holiday time when we gather with loved ones—when home becomes the warmth we circle around. When my spouse and I bought our house twenty years ago, we talked about getting a mezuzah. Mezuzahs are hung on the thresholds of Jewish homes, to signify the transition from the outer world to the inner. Inside each mezuzah is a prayer from the book of Deuteronomy. There was just one little hitch: Neither of us were Jewish.
Conscious Parenting: Mindfulness Tips Teens Wish Parents Knew
By Natalie Freeburn
As a high school mindfulness teacher, I enjoy guiding, practicing, and applying mindfulness techniques along with my students. Seeing them learn about themselves as they grow their mindfulness practice teaches me about them daily. Every year, however, my students tell me I should teach a mindfulness class for parents and guardians, too. So, I’ve asked them, what have you learned in this class that you would most like them to know? If adults can practice tuning inward and grounding themselves when they are faced with challenging situations or strong emotions, it becomes easier for us to teach our children to do the same.
Navigating Emotions
As human beings, we all experience a full range of emotions, but identifying how we feel at any given moment can be easier said than done. Of course, it’s easier to allow ourselves the space to feel emotions that are pleasant or acceptable to societal norms. What happens, though, when we’re feeling unpleasant emotions such as anger, sadness, anxiety, or boredom? When we don’t allow ourselves to feel what we feel, it can have many unintended consequences. Avoiding unpleasant feelings with cover-up behaviors is not uncommon. It can be hard to turn inward and admit what we are actually feeling and understand what those feelings are trying to tell us. Many people avoid uncomfortable feelings with distracting behaviors or negative choices. Oftentimes, people act as though they are angry, but when they look deeper, they may find they are feeling ashamed, disrespected, embarrassed, or hurt. Anger is more accessible and acceptable, especially for many boys who are told to “man up” or “don’t be a baby.” We need to be allowed to acknowledge the deeper, more vulnerable emotions. All feelings are normal, human, and okay to feel, however uncomfortable they may be. It can be helpful to think of our feelings as clouds—ever-changing, and some more pleasant than others. Some linger for a long time like the gray of a winter day; some come and go like a passing storm; some are beautifully full of color. When we are feeling unpleasant emotions, remember that eventually, like the clouds, it won’t always be this way. This can be helpful to remember when we feel stuck in an unpleasant emotion like anxiety or boredom—but leaning in to acknowledge the emotion is the first step in loosening its grip.
Accept and Allow All Feelings
One great way to utilize mindfulness is to recognize one’s emotions in order to deal with them, which is a practice Dr. Daniel Siegal calls, “Name it to Tame it.” Consider our feelings like a very excited toddler who has something important to tell you. The sweet child won’t stop begging for attention until what they are trying to say is repeated out loud. Once they are acknowledged, they feel heard, and they move on. Likewise, when we avoid acknowledging an unpleasant feeling, it tends to linger on until confronted. What we resist, persists. Therefore, model being vulnerable with your feelings around your kids. Talk about how you’re feeling, especially when you are feeling unpleasant. This act of vulnerability is not a sign of weakness but demonstrates your humanity to your kids, and it opens the doors for them to be open and vulnerable with you as well. Children and teens often hold difficult feelings inside all day when they are away from home. For many, home is often their safe space where they feel they can be themselves and still be accepted, because of this they often let it all out on the family or trusted loved ones. While this is hard and often creates tension at home, kids do this because they feel safe. As their parent, we should stay grounded, allow for some space, and then get curious about what’s really going on. Try staying calm and open, centered, taking a moment to pause before proceeding.
Power of the Pause
People typically act how they feel to some extent. When people feel right, they act right. However, when the emotions are less positive, having a personal meditation practice can help parents center themselves and avoid reacting rather than responding. Allowing time to pause when feeling annoyed, angry, or frustrated to think about how to respond rather than react out of strong emotion takes time and practice. Although hitting the pause button is difficult, kids are asked to do it all of the time. So, model this, “I’m so frustrated with your behavior right now. I need some time to cool off and then we’ll come back to it.” Or if you see your teen getting revved up, offer them time to step away for a moment. This lets our thinking brain and feelings brain reconnect; otherwise, we end up saying things that don’t work toward discovering the root of the problem.
Read related article:Where the Rubber Meets the Road: Strategies for the Emotional Challenges of Parenting — Helping Children Adjust to a New Sibling
Listen With Compassion and Without Judgment
Growing up is hard. Our teens face immense amounts of pressure to “succeed” in all areas of their lives. This pressure doesn’t only come from external sources like parents, teachers, coaches, and the media, but they are constantly comparing themselves to each other and putting additional pressure on themselves. All this while trying to figure out who they are, what they stand for, and where they fit in. It can feel hard and messy at times. From teaching, I have learned not to assume I know what’s going on in the lives of my students. Kids and teens can be very open and honest when they are given the space to say what’s on their minds without the fear of being judged or ridiculed. Try asking questions about how something might pan out to get them thinking of things they may not consider instead of judging them or offering advice. This helps them process and come to conclusions on their own and helps them build confidence in their ability to make difficult decisions.
Allow Space to “Mess Up”
We are all human. We all make mistakes. One of the top contributing factors to anxiety and students feeling hopeless is the fear of failure. Sometimes, fear is so great it prevents people from taking healthy risks such as contributing to discussions, talking to unfamiliar people, saying the wrong thing when making a phone call to schedule an appointment, or facing a challenge. A student once told me her mom calls mistakes “learning opportunities.” Wise advice! As a parent, it’s hard to see our kids struggle, and we want them to be successful and feel joy. However, we must allow our kids to feel disappointed, bored, and frustrated with low-stakes problems in life so that they may learn how to cope when life gets more challenging. When we “fix” problems for them, we rob them of the belief that they are capable of working through problems on their own. Becoming aware of how you respond to your own mistakes and how you react when your kids inadvertently mess up is more valuable. Responding with kindness, compassion, calmness, and blamelessness, allows them (and ourselves) the space to think about how to work through a mistake or problem, whether we process together or independently, can be one of the biggest gifts we can give them on how to handle the challenges they will face in adulthood.
Natalie Freeburn is a high school Family and Consumer Science, Mindfulness, and Careers in Education teacher in Saline, MI. She can be reached at freeburn@salineschools.org
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The King Family: Half a Century of Farming, Making Music, Teaching Yoga, and Building Community
The King family has been a prominent presence in the Ann Arbor and Southeastern Michigan community in a myriad of ways—as farmers, musicians, teachers, and more—for nearly fifty years. The roots of the King family and their Frog Holler Farm go back to 1971, to the founding of the Indian Summer restaurant in Ann Arbor. That’s where Indian Summer’s co-founder, co-owner, and head cook, Ken King, met Cathy Munkholm. Cathy had been hired to make salads at the restaurant and worked alongside Ken, chopping vegetables.
How a Pandemic Transformed My Life After High School--Perspectives and Resources from a 2020 High School Graduate
For the past eight years, music has been my life. As I progressed through high school, I began feeling pressured to say yes to opportunities because I felt like I needed to—for college applications, for my future career as a professional musician, and even as someone that couldn’t let my teachers (who had invested so much into my musical development) down. This pressure came from what I call the “Ann Arbor Excellence Phenomenon” (A2EP) – a force that values external accomplishments more than happiness and well-being.
Life Force: Discovering Invisible Allies Outside Your Door
As the sun moves higher in the sky, warming our bones and our soil, we might find ourselves more frequently drawn outside. We venture into our personal landscapes just outside the door, onto the trails of our neighborhood park, or even Nichols Arboretum, looking for more signs of life emerging from the earth. What is our personal connection with this green world outside? Some of us have started a spring vegetable garden, some of us hike or play regularly in the wild, and some of us might not know anything about plants—we just know what looks beautiful to us or how good we feel after spending time outdoors.
Great Tastes in Local Food, Spring 2021
I think we can all agree that 2020 was a tough year to launch a new business, especially one in food service with limited indoor seating. But if my visit to Ann Arbor’s new coffee shop Drip House is any indication, it is still possible to flourish.
Friends Lake Cooperative Community: A Nature-Based and Spiritual Sanctuary
Places that hold great spiritual energy and history have a special feel to them. For decades, it has been our family practice to pause and open our windows when we turn onto the dirt road that leads into the Friends Lake Cooperative Community. This is partly to inhale the smell of the pine trees near the entrance, and partly to feel the spirit of the place, and the immediate sense of refuge and relaxation it brings us.
Divine Order-- Not Disorder: How Sarah DesJardins' Personal Journey Informs Her Equine Therapy and Energy Healing Work
Down a country road and around a corner in lovely Manchester, hot tea and home-made chocolate-chip cookies (my favorite treats) awaited my arrival at Souls at Play Center for Creative Therapy. This was my third time seeing Sarah DesJardins. The first was at the Spring 2015 Holistic/Psychic Fair of Ann Arbor, where as a guest speaker, she presented a powerful seminar―“Psychic Awareness: The Silver Lining of Trauma”―maxing the venue’s capacity.
Weathering an Avalanche: Reflections On This Pandemic Year
I am writing this on the one-year anniversary of the first case of Covid-19 being diagnosed in Michigan. It is also the one-year anniversary of my mother’s memorial service. It was held here in Ann Arbor, at the church where I serve as a pastor. Her service was live cast on Facebook, a first for our little congregation. Family and friends tuned in from Hawaii, California, South Dakota, Arizona, Texas, Ohio, Maryland, and Florida. It was the first time in my 18 years as a pastor that I fully understood the value of live casting worship, an experience I and many of my colleagues have often considered too personal and intimate…too sacred maybe…for livestreaming on social media. It seemed so…televangelistic.
Crazy Wisdom Kids in the Community: Socially Conscious (And Distant) Kids’ Art & Personal Development Programs After the Toughest Parenting Year Yet
It has been a challenging year for group events, to say the least, as many kids’ programs around Ann Arbor went virtual or were suspended. The situation dragged on so long, I decided to create my own after-school program for half-grown kidlet—a mashup of virtual art programming and trying to get her out of the house and off her screen. Surprisingly, she adapted quite well to being home, so the biggest challenge was getting her moving again. I started thinking: what about all the other parents out there who are sick of researching which programs are still running or don’t have the brain space to plan enriching activities anymore? What if we came up with a plan for this year that didn’t depend on virus numbers to succeed? Here’s what I came up with. It’s pretty simple, though I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised, as I was, with some unique programs out there right now to choose from.
Back to Basics Health with Julie Johnson
Imagine receiving results from an air quality and blood test showing that your home needs remediation—and so does your body. There were astronomical levels of mold and fungus in your blood. You suffered from pneumonia and had so many x-rays taken that you almost glowed in the dark. The medications prescribed were barely treating the symptoms but were further depleting your already near-extinct immune system. Your doctors finally admit that they have no effective options for your condition; their final suggestion was to wait and see if your body began to win the fight on its own.
Finding Wellness Through Your Spiritual Anatomy
What do you get when a poet and a chiropractor set out to explore and revitalize the physical body from a spiritual perspective? Poet Elizabeth Alberda and I created the work and workshops called Spiritual Anatomy. Our journey took us from the inner workings of the body’s organs and tissue to the mystical and mythical writings and imaginings of teachers and scholars.
Local Food, Safety Precautions, and Friendly Faces: How the Ann Arbor Farmers Market Survived (and Continues to Thrive) During the Year of Covid
I first met Stefanie Stauffer, Manager for the Ann Arbor Farmers Market, while picking up food at Argus Farm Stop. I had seen her at local food events, but this was our first “hello.” I asked her if she was interested in talking about the virus and how the market has handled the challenges. Luckily, she agreed. We later had a Zoom meeting and began carving out slices of topics the public seemed curious to know. Both of us have similar backgrounds. We run small farms as well as have a vested interest in serving all people in our area with healthy, reasonably-priced food grown and produced in our own communities.
Conversations with Nature
There is a reason we feel more peaceful when we spend time connecting with our pets or hiking in the forest. Nature is in perpetual energetic flow and does not manipulate energy the way people do. Humans continually try to divert, filter, suppress, create, and extinguish energy. Because of this, when we are immersed in the flow of nature, our body’s energetic response is to line up with that frequency. We let go of a little of that human tendency to control energy. It’s relaxing, and when we are relaxed, we are open to receive communication from our own intuition as well as Source (the name I will use in reference to God, Universe, Deity, Divinity).
Healers of Ann Arbor: Acupuncture with Dr. Cynthia Esseichick
You can try a new type of massage or read a chiropractor’s online reviews, but how do you really know when a healing modality is right for you? Columnist Laura K. Cowan goes in depth with local healers to give you a behind-the-scenes look at what they really do to help people relax and heal.
Crysta Goes Visiting, Spring 2021
By Crysta Coburn
Erin Berger and the Bookend Candle Co.
“I have always loved reading, collecting books, and visiting libraries. There’s nothing like immersing yourself in a good book,” said Erin Berger, the woman behind Ypsilanti-based Bookend Candle Co. You and me both, friend!
Originally from Garden City, Berger attended grad school at Eastern Michigan University, where she “grew to love Ypsilanti, especially the (surprisingly affordable) old houses.” The year following completing her master’s degree in historic preservation, she bought her home in the Historic District. As for starting her own home-based candle business, she said, “I remember attending DIYpsi in the summer of 2017 and thinking about how amazing the artists were and what in the world could I create to take part in the event. Later that year, I decided to start what would become Bookend Candle Co.”
Berger is a self-taught candlemaker. “I learned through trial and error and many nights spent in deep dives on candle-making forums,” she said. “But the best part is that for every candle that doesn’t make the cut, I still get to burn it myself.” Deciding on a name was difficult, she said, “until [she] looked around at [her] collection of candles interspersed throughout the shelves and stacks of books” of her home. “Most were functioning as impromptu bookends. And that was it; Bookend Candle Co. had a name.”
Her candles are 100% soy made without dyes or phthalates. “I do my best to offer the highest quality product in terms of performance, safety, and sustainability,” Berger explained. “I have asthma myself and don’t want to be breathing in harmful chemicals. I would never sell a product that is not up to my own standards, so I use as natural components as possible and buy from vendors I trust. Our tagline is ‘realistically scented and ethically made,’ and I take that to heart.”
Some of the scents in the Signature Collection are Breathe Easy (scent notes: camphor, eucalyptus, and mint), Rare Book Room (scent notes: cedarwood, leather, and vanilla), and Mountainside Cabin (scent notes: balsam, cedar, and wood-burning fireplace). There is also a Spring and Summer Collection with names like Spring Meadow, Kitchen Garden, and Seaside Cottage. If you are in a situation where you can’t burn candles, there are also wax melts and reed diffusers.
All of these names evoke in me a sense of comfort and relaxation. Berger shared that one thing that inspires her business is “being able to provide people with a sense of comfort and happiness through scent.” She went on to say, “My goal is to transport you to a different place or time. Hearing one of my candles reminds someone of time spent as a child with a grandparent no longer with them makes it all worth it.”
For more information and a list of shops that carry Bookend Candle Co. products, visit www.bookendcandleco.com. Bergen can be contacted at erin@bookendcandleco.com or via Instagram @bookendcandleco.
Lyanna Bennett and Mystic Creations
Lyanna Bennett has moved around a lot in her life, but she is putting down roots in Ann Arbor. She told me, “I fell in love with Ann Arbor after spending a lot of time here in my early 20s and finally decided to settle in one place.” And her specialties certainly fit right in with our community.
“I first discovered mysticism when I was 12 years old,” she shared with me. “I was fascinated by the supernatural nature of it. Spells and potions and magickal beings were what drew me in, but it brought me to the concept of natural healing, herbalism, and spiritual guidance, which is what led me toward the path I am on today … offering services to the community reading tarot, runes, and tea leaves, as well as offering advice on alternative healing methods.” Bennett is mostly self-taught, but, she said, “I did go to college to learn more about plants and the human body in order to know more about how natural medicine works.”
The drive to help people is what inspires her. “I have always been drawn to serve others,” she said. “I was a home health aid for many years, I have always worked in some sort of customer service industry, and I even thought about going into the military to be a medic.” Bennett is also motivated to make her spiritual practices a central part of her life. “I do think we all find the path that we are meant to be on,” she said.
The name Mystical Creations came to Bennett one day after working for a metaphysical store in Lansing. In addition to offering private readings, Bennett plans to soon add “online courses ... covering everything from the basics of witchcraft to divination techniques, properties of herbalism, advanced magick, the philosophy of magick, and many more.”
Right now, you can find Bennet offering tarot cards and runic divination readings at Evenstar’s Chalice in Ypsilanti.
To make an appointment, visit facebook.com/lyannabennett.mystic or call (734) 680-2707. For in-person readings, visit Evenstar’s Chalice in Ypsilanti on Thursdays 2 p.m. to 6 p.m. or Saturdays 3 p.m. to 7 p.m. Appointments can also be scheduled by calling Evenstar’s Chalice at (734) 905-7980.
Drew Hill and The Drewbie’s Zoo
“I am all about fun,” said Ann Arbor native Drew Hill. “I try to find a little fun and whimsy in everything I do, and since starting Drewbie’s Zoo, my goal has been to share that with others.”
Hill attended Pioneer High School then studied Costume Design at the University of Michigan. “Since graduating college,” he said, “I’ve lived in Chicago and Los Angeles, but Ann Arbor keeps calling me back. It’s such an amazing city to live in, and it’s great to be close to my family.”
It was Hill’s grandmother who taught him how to knit when he was ten years old. “I became obsessed!” he said. “I knit on and off all the way through middle school and high school. When I was in my last year at Pioneer, I started a small club for knitting and yarn crafts, and it was at this time that I first picked up a crochet hook. I taught myself from a book and was amazed at the artistic freedom that crochet offers.”
When a good friend from high school and his wife were expecting their first child, Hill first tried his hand at amigurumi, the Japanese art of knitting or crocheting small stuffed animals and other anthropomorphic creatures, which make up the bulk of Drewbie’s Zoo.
Where did the name Drewbie’s Zoo come from? “It wasn’t until I opened an Etsy shop that I realized I would need some sort of business name, which was surprisingly difficult,” Hill said. “I wanted it to have something to do with animals and to be a little whimsical. I toyed around with a lot of different ideas, but I settled on Drewbie’s Zoo because it was the most fun to say out loud!”
Looking through Hill’s Instagram, there is no denying his talent or the cuteness of his clever creations. Said Hill, “Sometimes you just need something cute or punny or beautiful to make you smile, and providing that for others definitely makes me smile!” Some of my personal favorites are the adorable little dragons, smiling tea cups and coffee mugs, the cast of the Lion King, and Luna from Sailor Moon (I grew up in the 90s). But, they all make me smile! And how inspiring for a young person to have a plush Ruth Bader Ginsburg or Rosie the Riveter?
If you have an idea in mind, but don’t see it in the shop, worry not because Hill takes special orders. He explained, “One of the best parts about running a small business is that I can provide something completely unique, whether it’s your favorite animal, character, or even a replica of your pet!”
For more information, visit drewbieszoo.etsy.com or instagram.com/drewbieszoo. Hill can be contacted through Etsy or at drewbieszoo@gmail.com.
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For the modern toddler parent, potty training is an important—and often overwhelming—rite of passage. With an especially willful child, potty training can devolve into begging, bribing, breakdowns, and giving up. The common phrase repeated on modern mommy blogs and parenting influencers is to “wait until your toddler is ready!”